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It should be obvious now that I am something of a sexual predator -- not in the serious sense of attacking men and taking what I want, but in the sense of pushing the envelope as far as I can. I'm aware of that and haven't decided whether it is right or wrong. One thing is clear to me: Men and women are different in this area. Women, being the weaker sex, have to worry about forcible rape more than men do, and women also have to worry about unwanted pregnancy. That makes women as a group more conservative than men are. Men, on the other hand -- at least some of us -- seem to always be looking for an opportunity to have sexual contact. Men are more willing to have quick sexual encounters in public than women are. Gay men in particular are promiscuous because the dampening attitudes of women are not involved. Thus, instances of gay men groping each other in crowded subway cars are not that uncommon, but you'll never find women behaving that way. Men also expose themselves in public more than women do.
For a few years, I worked as a masseur specifically to get my hands on men. For the most part, that worked out because 90% of the men who came to me wanted a "happy ending". But not all of them did. I will honestly recount here (and in articles to come) all of the experiences that I remember. Most of the stories are hot, but a few are disturbing.
In the 1980's I had left New York City and was living in Providence, RI. I was holding a yard sale one day, when up walked a man in his 20's in tight cycling shorts. He had a large, delicious-looking bulge in his shorts. Unlike most cycling shorts, which flatten out a man's bulge, these shorts were designed with a pouch to accommodate the genitals, so his bulge stuck out very prominently. I thought to myself, "How can I get my hands on the bulge of a man like this?" The answer came to me immediately: Learn to give massages. His bulge looked so attractive that day that it became a motivating image in my mind.
There was a local organization that gave classes to adults on various subjects, and I found a class on massage. The class lasted several weeks, and I very carefully recorded the procedure for giving a complete Swedish massage. I then purchased a massage table from a catalogue, and I was ready to go into business. As it turned out, there were no laws in Rhode Island in the late 1980's that required me to get a license (at least, I couldn't find any). Believe it or not, Rhode Island at that time allowed prostitution to be practiced indoors (apparently, there was a loophole in the law). I didn't know that during the time that I was practicing massage there. If I had, I would have been much more relaxed about what I was doing because I assumed that my massage practice was illegal.
I put an ad in the local paper advertising "full-body massage". I told the first customers who called that I was still a student learning the skill, and I charged them very little. The teacher who instructed me had taught her students to "drape" the body with a large sheet, and in the beginning, that's what I did. That damn sheet, however, caused me to miss out on some sex play that I otherwise would have enjoyed. The men who got the full-drape treatment probably assumed that I was a legitimate masseur, and usually didn't come back. In the beginning, I wasn't as aggressive about seducing the customers as I was later, which is why so many of them got away without the "happy ending". I learned very quickly, though.
I remember one client in particular. He was a late-20's white man with dark hair. I gave him a legitimate massage and was unable to find an easy way to molest him while it was proceeding. I was, in fact, nervous that any client I molested might assault me in anger, so I was very tentative. When he got up from the table, he made no attempt to hide his naked body -- he had a lovely physique and was gloriously well hung. He needed to make a phone call (this was before the days of cell phones), so I brought him my phone on a long cord. Out of modesty, he felt the need to hide his genitals from me while he spoke, so he crouched on the floor in a way that he imagined would hide them -- but it didn't. They simply hung down between his thighs, giving me a clear view of them while I stood ten feet away. His cock and balls were low-hangers and just lovely to look at. I still fantasize about that moment.
So it wasn't long before I eliminated the big sheet. I switched to a bath towel, and then to a face towel, and eventually to a small hand towel. I would ask the customer to disrobe, lie on the table face up, and then put the hand towel over his crotch (while I left the room). Of course, the hand towel barely covered the anatomy of many customers. I remember one man incredulously holding the towel up to his crotch (before he had disrobed) to see if it would cover him -- but he didn't object.
Mind you, if the customer wasn't attractive to me, I would give him a bath towel and avoid the seductive strokes.
In all the time that I gave professional massage, I always started on the man's front. I did this mainly so that I could get my hands on his privates quickly, but also so that I could end the massage with the back side, which is the most satisfying part for the client. I would do a circular stroke on the lower abdomen (a proper Swedish stroke), and I would do it deeply enough to make the man's cock bounce out from under the hand towel. It would then start to collide with my hand, and before long he would be growing an erection. If he was embarrassed and apologized for it, I would simply say, "Oh, don't worry about it -- ninety percent of my male customers get erections. It is a normal reaction to being touched all over." That, of course, was true; and as I said above, ninety percent of my customers DID want some sexual contact.
My comment that most customers got erections subtly gave them permission to just enjoy their sexual feelings. Even the straight customers felt that freedom, and I did end up masturbating most of them. For many of them, I may have been the first male-male sexual contact they ever had, and that actually makes me proud. As a gay man, I have an interest in opening straight men to their gay sides.
Usually, once the man was hard, I would make a comment that we "might as well dispense with the towel", and I would just remove it, leaving him lying there exposed with an erection.
Whether I removed the towel or not, I would choose one of two courses. I would either massage his lower stomach for a long time, allowing my hand to collide with his hard cock, or I would simply start to massage his cock and masturbate him. Some of the men's cocks got very hard and it was almost humorous to see them bouncing all over the place while I worked on the stomach. If I masturbated the man at that point, the massage would still continue, and I might end up masturbating him a second time.
The reactions of my customers were varied. For some of them, none of this was a surprise; they had received sexual massages from others. For others, they came expecting to have to control their libido while they received a legitimate massage. For those, being molested in a gradual and sensitive way was a relief (because they no longer had to "hold it in"). Almost none of them were turned off by what I did. The ones who didn't want a "happy ending" just didn't get aroused no matter what I did. Once, after I had moved to New York City, I massaged a very attractive young man who did not become hard. I really wanted to play with his junk, so I touched his genitals and said, "I can take care of this for you", and he replied, "There's nothing to take care of!"
But none of them reacted as if they were being violated. Whatever happened, they just took it in stride.
I wanted to suck many of my customers, but they rarely wanted that. Partly, they may have been worried about disease, not knowing that it is very hard to get AIDS from a blowjob (I don't have AIDS). But for many of them, getting a blowjob was just too intimate. It felt too much like real sex. They were happy to get a handjob from a man, but feeling my warm, wet mouth on their penises was just too much.
I had more techniques to arouse my customers, of course. If massaging their bellies didn't get them aroused, then when I massaged their legs, I would massage very high on their thighs, "accidentally" touching their genitals with my fingers. Or I would simply massage their groin area around their genitals, an area that a legitimate masseur usually won't touch. The customers, of course, didn't know what was a legitimate stroke and what wasn't. In some cases, the customer would get a hard-on as soon as he disrobed, and in those cases I'd just keep stroking it during the massage, and then jerk him to an orgasm at the end.
Once they had turned over, I could also massage too high on the backs of their thighs, allowing my fingers to brush against their testicles. In New York, I had a Hispanic customer around 40 who had absolutely enormous, plump balls. I just had to get my hands on them. I kept brushing my fingers against his testicles, until finally he lifted his groin and pulled his testicles under his belly. I don't know what was going on in his mind when he did that. He might not have liked the feeling, or he might not have realized that sex was part of the massage I was offering. Or he might have thought that I was doing it accidentally, as if I didn't know what my fingers were up to. After the massage was over and he was standing naked in front of me (which he didn't seem to mind), I simply informed him that I would have masturbated him if he had wanted, and then I reached right out and grabbed his cock and balls. But he didn't get an erection even then. So at least I got my hands on his package for thirty seconds. That man was one of the very few who didn't want any kind of sex. I did feel a little bad for pawing him so much when it wasn't what he wanted, but he didn't seem harmed in any way. He didn't seem unhappy when he paid me. However, he never came back.
With the exception of the Hispanic man, I never just grabbed a customer's genitals if he showed no signs of arousal. I considered doing that as a seduction technique, but I didn't have the nerve. If I had done such a thing, and if the client had objected, I would have simply said, "Oh, I thought you knew that this is a full-body massage. That's what the ad says." My defense against clients that I didn't want to masturbate was to tell that that the term "full-body" didn't include their genitals.
On a few occasions, I had attractive customers who didn't want any sexual contact because they were getting enough in their regular lives. One attractive gay man was upfront about that: He was getting all the sex that he wanted already. As you have probably guessed, I am a sucker for plump balls, and this man's balls, though not huge, were extraordinarily round, like golf-balls. I really wanted to feel them, but he had no interest, and told me so.
In future articles I will describe more of the massage experiences I had.
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